Sunday, April 8, 2012

I’m a Ponderer

In the mid-90s I and my then-boyfriend left Seattle on bicycles, heading north on the Burke-Gilman trail. We cut across Washington, traversing five mountain passes along the North Cascades Highway. The ride was exhilarating and painful (my mantra as we muscled up the inclines was “never again, never again”). After pedaling through Idaho, we made it to Glacier National Park, where we powered over Rocky Mountain peaks, then continued across Montana to Havre, smack in the middle of the state.

Pretty impressive, huh? Here's another version of this story, also true:

In the mid-90s I and my then-boyfriend set out from Seattle to bike cross-country but we only made it to the middle of Montana, where we holed up in a Havre hotel for three days watching bad TV and scarfing down Dairy Queen Blizzards before hopping on an Amtrak train to New York.


Doesn't pack the same punch, does it? It’s all about how you frame the story.

I’ve been thinking about that as I ponder creating a profile for the online personals. How did I come to live with two pitties? What's life with Tommy and Louise like? What version of that story do I tell?

23 comments:

  1. I like the one u posted last... and it sums up what u are looking for in a man... As far as the online personals- beware is all I can say... Got loads of stories I could tell ya...

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  2. Well, I know what happened with the second pittie because I was there. The humane society said they were going to put her down, and I thought, "I guess that's that." But it wasn't that, it was this. Because you've got a big, big heart.

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  3. I think the best version is like a good story, you leave the reader wanting more. Let them know you're a kitty/pittie mum but leave enough unsaid so they'll want to find out, "Who is this smart and capable woman with a heart for critters?".

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  4. Somehow I feel like I missed something.... going on vacation sends me out of whack

    Stop on by for a visit
    Kari
    http://dogisgodinreverse.com

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  5. All that really matters is that anyone who disapproves is not worth your time.

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  6. Kalei, oh, right, my last post: finding a guy with Tommy's qualities (well, some of them). Thanks for the reminder.

    About the personals, yeah, I've heard some horror stories, but I also know a few people who've met their life partners. Like anything in life, it can go either way.

    Hiker, you're so sweet. Funny...I'd almost forgotten about that fateful visit to the PHS; so much has happened since then. And about that big, big heart: likewise. Seriously. I know all about how you ended up with Albert, not to mention Newt.

    Paula, "heart for critters" might just find its way into that good story I spin. Thank you for that.

    Kari, I've been out of the blog loop for months so if things seem out of whack that's my fault.

    Margaret, you've hit the nail on the head. Wise woman.

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  7. Yes. Margaret. Nail. Head.

    Truth. No spin. The person who is attracted to that is the person you want. Otherwise, you have to pretend to be something you're not. If you can't be yourself with your mate, he's not your mate. I have years of awful stories to back me up on this.

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  8. Agreed. I have lots of those stories, too, Petrea. And I definitely don't want to relive them.

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  9. Oh, Sue - I think you know how I feel on the subject. It will present itself when it does and the stars will align - including with Tommy, Louise and the kitties. But if you want to go the route of looking for it, pick a reputable company. I have a good friend who met his bride on eHarmony. I don't know if that many people read the personal ads in the paper anymore...:)

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  10. I like both stories :-) Nothing is black and white. There can be many "true" stories.
    As for telling the stories about animals, I always start to feel weird when I only hear "good" things about them. "Good" in a sense they feed human's happiness and morale. I stopped reading Best Friends AS's website for that reason.
    Many praise the pit bulls that have become therapy dogs, or the ones that are "ambassadors" even after the unfortunate past. But we shouldn't forget there are so many with "faults" whatever the causes may be, who struggle to fit in the human societies. I would like to hear both ups and downs along everyday life with them.

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  11. I prefer, or Like, the tale you spin when you got caught up north in a dairy queen blizzard.

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  12. Liz, I will steer clear of any newspaper or craigslist-type ads. And maybe the stars will align while I ponder/procrastinate.

    Maiko, I think covering the ups and downs of life with a pittie is really important as well.

    Cafe, you made me laugh. But of course you'd like the DQ Blizzard.

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  13. I like the first version with the second ending. It makes you appear realistic enough to realize you might not want to jump tall buildings in a single bound. That you like dairy products and bad TV. And somehow you ended up in Los Angeles, without the guy, and a collection of pets. Whats not to love?

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  14. Love Tommy's face! He has so sweet eyes!

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  15. PA, it's been a strange trip. I like your synopsis and love your ending.

    Good advice, Jean.

    Sonia, that picture was taken just a few months after I found Tommy. He's always had sweet eyes, but he was a real terror back then! I'm glad those days are behind me.

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  16. I'm all for Petrea's 'no spin' approach. May as well have it clear from the outset and increase your chances of attracting someone genuine with a kind heart. {Tommy always makes my heart flutter.}

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    1. Thanks for weighing in, Shell. If I ever get beyond the pondering stage, I will take your advice to heart.

      Isn't Tommy a looker? He knows it, too.

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  17. Susan - I have a confession to make. I've removed you from my available bachelor list. It's not you, it's them. Although interesting fellows, after close observation ( based on their actions) I've come to a conclusion. They are not good enough for you. They both score too high for comfort on the "how much of a pill can you be?" scale.

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  18. PA, I have a low tolerance for pills so you're doing me a huge favor. Thank you for your discerning screening of available bachelors.

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  19. Life with a mate has enough twists and turns without having to live up to something you're not... Margaret and Petrea are right on!!!

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  20. (My WV was ssusin!!! There must be a prophetic message in there somewhere!!!)

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  21. Chieftess, I think the message is I should keep ssusin/sussing out the men until I find the right one. Excellent advice! So is your first comment with the twists and turns.

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